There was a time when looking at the sky made me feel like a part of something huge and beautiful… I felt nice about myself, that I’m built of stardust and love.
But sometimes now when I look up…these thoughts elude me like the stars.
And I feel in me a sadness so deep, so ancient and unexplainable, that I cant help but clutch myself and weep.
Lately ive discovered why this happens…
and it’s just plainly because,
I feel like this desolate landscape that no one would paint
like this tiny speck that doesn’t control where it goes
like this one drop of rain that would land far, far from the warmth of earth and hearth
like a small nobody… with an insignificant share of Time in the universe.
And all these heavy metaphors in my head sift down to one single thought…
about how very utterly lonely I am.
And that feels like something that would never change.